neither need to cry nor to sad. I'm fine.

*deeply sorry for my poor english.

I'm neither beautiful nor rich, but Thanks God, so far I had everything I need, and I ain't be pushed for anything. For that I'm thankful. Yet, sometimes I feel like I am a luckless human being, I face something weird in my social life. You know, for me Making friends with other is easy, but to be a bestfriend is not. iDK why. maybe there's something wrong on me, on them, or both of we are wrong? LOL

today I feel that way, again. yeah I lil bit sad though this isn't the first time I feel like I could be their unintended, feel like I am is nothing, I am the second, I am the last choice. I'm the wrong person to invite if you wanna go hangout for shopping. It is boring when I included in your party. kinda luckless? something like that. I ever thought am I nerd? am I too serious? am I too perfectionist? am I too idealist, don't have sense of humour, or may be I am a monster so some friends feel uncomfort with me? well... actually they do nothing on me, n say nothing. but I can feel that uncomfortness.

this is terrible you know. I don't wanna spend my life that way.  who wanna be alone? no one! these are make me sick, and have made me stress. somehow, life must go on..  suka ga suka itu hak orang.. ada yg suka sama aku. ada juga yang ga. dan aku ga bisa maksa orang orang untuk suka terus sama aku. aku ya gini, mau temenan alhamdulillah, keberatan juga ga papa... sukar "ngeklik" sama aku? gapapa, toh aku juga ngerasa gitu, aku memang punya kesulitan untuk bisa become closer with someone. bukan kali ini aja, tapi emang sedari jaman dahulu kala.. so don't take this wrong way, alias jangan salah ngerti atas tujuan aku ngepost beginian disini. I just wanna share about my weird life. tentang kenapa yaa kok aku sulit bener klik sama orang. begitu juga orang, kenapa ya kok sepertinya mereka sulit untuk ngeklik sama aku. just that.

aah biarlah, mungkin memang beginilah aku, beginilag Tuhan ngasih kepribadian buat aku. for my weird life, I just take it and I'll do some funs with it, so finally I could decide to stop wondering it. I am just the way I am, and nobody in this world is perfect. so happy happy happy!!! there's neither need to cry nor to sad.  my life is mine, struggled by me, and for my self. quesera sera... just smile.

remember this : You, just like me, we absolutely have done something wrongly.